December...

My bestie's posts on FB.....her posts -no matter what- always make my day *smile*

and best ones were the i dropped series :P

I LOVE YOU LAYAL!!!!

may we stay BFFs for ever 

:D

and this is how it feels at times....Sleeping....

screaming from joy...

God is looking at me and blessing me and showing me that life isnt all grey and blue...

i lost 2 people in my social life....a friend ....she is a very talented girl and it got awkward between us....and she chosen to remove me from her life and now im respecting her decisions and im staying away....and a great friend who and i admit had a crush on for more than 2 years....he also has decided that its best if we parted and .....well you know how it goes....

but truth of the matter is.....i didn't want to lose them....but i guess our friendship wasn't meant to be and i got into a bit of a depression...

but....
yes there is a but....
as what they say....when God closes a door, he opens up a window....and if you keep looking behind you may miss what is in front of you....

when i decided to get back on my feet
it was weird but i felt happy....i got hyper.....and a lot has happened..
i think someone likes me
ummm....i did a good deed *huge smile* which got me to smile, cause i felt like im useful...
gentlemen ....gentlemen EVERYWHERE!!! hahaha...yes everywhere i go (in college) there is a nice guy being nice to me ...lol
and most importantly...

2 amazing looking italian men are in our college *huge smile*
that united me and my girls and raised our spirits to the fullest :D
I thank God for blessing us with them...
i thank God for blessing me with these events and giving me the strength to look forward....

though i admit....i miss them...
no one stays for ever, right? :)
you just gotta live and let go...
(yet i will be here if they ever thought of returning *baby smile*)

What makes me sad when it comes to socialising...

These phrases always get told to me by various people:

• If you add importance to other people, you decrease your own value and importance. 
• You don't need them.....if they don't need you.
• people that mind don't matter and people that matter won't mind.
• concentrate on those who feel comfy around you.

and many more within that same context...

....but me....being me....I do not always listen..... I put people before me....for I do not know what reason...

and time passes by and they might end up leaving me behind....and in the end it is me who gets sad...

and at times....it's not only being left behind but it could be something like:

• when things get awkward and the other person decides to just walk away instead of trying to make it work, if only you could've told me your reason...or is it cause you are over considering that you are scared to hurt me on the way??
• when a person who claims that they do NOT pretend, then they do exactly that when talking to you!! all i ask is please stop hiding...if you hate me....just say so and I shall leave you alone...
• when someone just gets jealous of me for no reason...then starts calling me fake...I am sorry if my natural look bothers you so much....and I am sorry for being genuine and honest ... 
• people who take me as a threat....here is what you can do, ever heard of "keep your friends close....but your enemies closer!"....well if you take me as an enemy, you can work with that concept....get to know me WELL...after awhile you shall realise that I am the LAST person to take as a threat....(truth of the matter is... I suck at being evil...)

there are a few more points which i have forgotten about ... but these are the main points...because I feel like what could have been a great friendship could be destroyed with these simple steps... and it makes me sad that it had or it will have to end like that... 

who knows....maybe in another lifetime we would be closies...

My social rules...

Okay I just want to say something ....and this may sound very weak of me....but it does not necessarily mean that I am....cause I am NOT....its just how I feel I should be:

I am not a social butterfly...but I am starting to turn that way and I admit...I like being social and I am starting to like people (yes, including those who hate me....I like you...you might make me sad, but I still like you)...

Let us begin:

• You be nice to me, I be nice to you.
• Even if you left me hanging there, I would wait for a while till you get back.
• And when I leave that spot, it is NOT cause I am making it hard for you to find me, in fact....one of the 2 would happen: 

1.  I would either leave trails so you could find me...
2. You won't need to look for me, cause I would've found you...

• I am not scared to being friends with the most NOTORIOUS person, because I believe everyone has that spark of goodness within them and you can't say OR judge a person if you do NOT know them, right? (....get to know them!! you might be surprised *wink wink*)
• I might not be good in telling my feelings, but my actions shows so.....and I apologise if I was being vague .... that is me being nervous *shyly looks away*
• I might be shy at first OR look like I do NOT want to be there next to you....but then again, it is just me being nervous, cause I do not know how to interact and react with people...
• When I act crazy....do not be afraid....I am just comfy around you *smile*
• When I get over-hyped around you....I might just like (have a crush on) you and I do not know how to react around you, so I spontaneously combust around-and act like ed the hyena from "The Lion King"  - you instead (sorry in advance to the future crush and sorry to the one I had a crush on before *looks away*).

Soooo....yes, this is known about me....just thought I might put it in writing....

Please be good to me...

Something i dont celebrate but, Halloween is soon..

having all the proofs yet still confused...

how I felt playing League of Legends for the first time

Loki and Thor

this is exactly how me and my sister are like

Cuteness overload ~huskies~

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

how my tan looks

It is pretty much....like this ...

XD

and if only you saw the shocked faces of my family after I finished dressing up
hahahaha

Sunshine Award

I'd like to thank Eternity for this award it is reaalllyy sweet of you and you are super amazing *smile*

Rules

1. Include the award logo in a post or on your blog page.

2. Answer 10 questions about yourself. These are below.

3. Nominate 10 -12 other fabulous bloggers.

4. Link your nominees to this post and comment on their blog, letting them know about the award.

5. Share the love and link the person who nominated you

Questions

1.What would you most like to change about yourself?

the way i think of things...i used to believe that i was reallly optimistic and see the bright colors, but i realised that im the total opposite >.> plus i need to gain control over my focus (i forget and daydream a lot) XD

2. What is your theme song?

well for now...it is "Black bird" by Alter Bridge 

3.One part of your life memory, action, etc. that you wish you could surgically remove from your brain?

a lot dunno which one to choose <.<

4. What generation do you wish you had been apart of?

If anything i  would choose the prophet Mohammed's time...faith 9000 :P

otherwise i am cool with mine too :)

5. What was your favorite childhood toy?

our consoles (atari, nintendo and the playstation 1) 

:)

6.What's your favorite housecleaning chore?

well.....if anything i think cooking is >.> even though i barely do it XD

7. Do you Tweet?

yep yep but barely anything :P @SueMaameri 

8. Any goals?

ummmm....well i once did.....but now im not sooo sure... 

9. Do you really drink coffee all the time?

only when i have to (im not a fan of it...i love tea or milk shakes more than coffee plus it makes me sleepy)

10. What is the ugliest car you've ever driven and were embarrassed to be seen in?

so far none :P

Nominating

well i shall give this to who ever reads this blog >.> 

<.<

>.>

<.<

annnnddddd :D

Miss L <3

:D

have a lovely day :D

well....

If I say something....why do I feel otherwise?
Why cant I accept the facts?
Why cant I move on?
What is holding me back?

Those were the questions that were eating me alive at one point of my past time, but now I can declare "Game Over" and "K.O.".

I have lost and I can accept that, yet it doesn't mean that I should just give up on something I believe in...it only means that one chapter, one event of my life is over and a new one is starting...
and I should be happy for what is to come is much much bigger and brighter for me...

Who knows, next time when I cross paths with my past event, the person I will be will know how to react better than the person I was...

Life is filled with surprises and Allah has written my fate, my job now is to uncover those events step by step and who knows...well... Allah does *silly face* hehe but i feel a brighter and more exciting events to occur :D

*achievement(s) unlocked: optimism level 20, bravery +10, happiness +20*

An inter-species (racial) love story

well just wanted to post these videos :D

they are awesomely animated and included with a good love story and moral to watch and learn :D

enjoy

it is called "There she is" and it's done by Sambazka :D

Step one:

Step two:

Step three:

Step four:

concluded with step five:

hope you enjoyed it as much as i did *smiley face*

love should not be about things that won't really matter, cause it comes from from the heart...
it is not bound to anything and can be in anything...

Love is....love <3

Cute..

i believe a guy would find the person he likes cute no matter what...

so why do us women stress over it?

why do we let our self esteem go under the red line of insecurity?

why...

???

question that always boggle my mind...

can someone answer it??

>.>

blue jeans - Lana Del Rey ~Sue Lyrics~

Blue jeans, Black shirt
Walked into the room you know you made my eyes burn
It was like G. Butler, for sure
You so fresh to death & sick as ca-cancer
You were sorta Classical, I grew up on hip hop
But you fit me better than my favorite sweater, and I know
That love is mean, and love hurts
But I still remember that day we met in November, oh baby!


I will love you till the end of time
I would wait a million years
Promise you'll remember that you're mine
Baby can you see through the tears?
Love you more
Than those bitches before
Say you'll remember, oh baby, say you'll remember
I will love you till the end of time 



Big dreams, wants adventure
Said you had to leave to go camping else where
I was thinking: "no please, stay here,"
We can be together and  we can make it all work
But he headed out on Wednesday, said he'd come home Friday
I stayed up waitin', anticipatin' and pacin' but he was
Chasing nature
"exploring places" that was the last I heard


I will love you till the end of time
I would wait a million years
Promise you'll remember that you're mine
Baby can you see through the tears?
Love you more
Than those bitches before
Say you'll remember, oh baby, say you'll remember
I will love you till the end of time


You went out every night
And baby that's alright
I told you that no matter what you did I'd be by your side
Cause Ima ride or die
Whether you fail or fly
Well shit, at least you tried.
But when you walked out that door, a piece of me died
I told you I wanted to be yours-but that not what I had in mind
I just want it like before
We were chattin' all night
Then they took you away- stole you out of my life
You just need to remember.... 



Will love you till the end of time
I would wait a million years
Promise you'll remember that your mine
Baby can you see through the tears?
Love you more
Than those bitches before
Say you'll remember, oh baby, say you'll remember
I will love you till the end of time


---------------------------


that is how i would sing it :p

Blood & Chocolate: The Man with the determined heart

im a man, a lonely traveller

haunted by my past and the sadness of my soul

i once shared a heart with a women of true grace and kindness

she left my perfect portrait of a happy family

to succed her dreams of not being bored

an image i thought she did not protray, yet i was blind and completely wrong ..

i now walk alone

followed by my shadow

i seek a house to call it my home

i do not seek vengance 

or blood shed on the floor

i forgive but i do not forget

for my past i still mourn 

i have fought my way to the skies

and were known by those who are called legends of our lives 

asked to be apart and forget the faces i once knew

the more i venture alongside them, the less pain on my wound..

i agreed to their rules

i went on untill  all was gone

i became something i am not

a warrior...fighting for a cause...

wars and warlords i have met

different tasks and tests

i strived to be the man

that brought justice right to the ones in the blue...

injury i have met

as i sailed alone to the enemy's nest

left me there

on my death bed

in the ashes of my vest...

Blood & Chocolate pt1...

this poem goes on between 2 people who are supposedly interested in one another yet are so far apart...

a warrior(represents blood) and a woman from the land (represents chocolate)>.>

the bold part would be the man's words and the italic part is the woman's words :D

hope you enjoy :D

-----------------------------------------

drip and drop

the feeling of it all

fading and withering away with the snow fall

tick and tock 

the sound ecos in mind

making it hard to concentrate what is in line

drip and drop

the blood ripples i see

my life flashes before my eyes

all happiness fleed 

helplessly i lay there

dead as i may seem

a helping hand rises 

and saves me from that scene...

a man with no name

just a sword and sheild

a man that was injured

and left to bleed till deceased 

unconcious he lays

as i watch and mend his wounds

i touch his skin and see

the innocence of the moon

i walk away

and go to pray

for his safety and health to regain 

tick tock

the time flies by

would the dripping stop

or would it carry him goodbye..

a flower scenery

I am left on the ground

roses were red

and some trees were brown

a maiden's beauty shined from afar

i am amazed and shocked

could I have landed in the heavens above

she smelled of chocolate

I wreaked of blood

yet her touch healed me 

and brought me back to life

she served me a sweet

known as the cocoa bean

as she looked at me with care

and a bit of desire

and I woke up to find her in my reality 

she sat there looking worried

sat there with sorrowful smile 

drip and drop

the blood had stopped

and all wounds found are gone for ever...

----------------------------------------------

what i meant with "sorrowful smile" is that she was sad....NOT smiling... >.>

just so you know :D

hope you liked it..

Blood & Bone

how many times you stood by me
protecting and keeping me safe
from all evil and matters of the un-said


how many time you shield me from harm
making sure no one shred me to bits and pieces
making sure no one touches me in a meaningless way


how many times you wished me well
you wished me happiness
and joy...and im truly honored to have a connection with ...

Love and infatuation

ok...truthfully...

i went through a week a confusion...cause i just came out of a crush and started to annoy my friend...

we talk a lot..

i got used to talking to him....and he understands me well...

i think i like him.... but i also think i was mixing liking with a simple infatuation ...

i highly respect him...and i just LOOOVVEEEE talking to him...

but what i hate is that....im re-living my last crush again....and i dont want that :(

sooo this time...im not going to say anything....and wait....to see what happens next...

if it was meant to be....then it shall happen....and my heart will finally find love...

if it wasnt...then time will mend my heart...

i just have to wait and see :)

the dark side of the moon..

what im talking about is this hollow within my heart...

im just gonna say it out loud....im honestly DEPRESSED!!!
it sucks...

one part of me is saying and giving out the illusion of being ok...
the other part is dying bit by bit
and im feeling that my flesh is withering away ...

one of my deepest fears is being alone...
i hate this feeling...
the feeling and the knowledge of not being loved ...

i think im going crazy...
i think im loosing it...
and i feel sooo lost..

i wish...that...
the person that cares for me, could just appear from no where and hug me and tell me that everything will be ok...

im not bothered with life anymore....and i think the best decision now is to stop caring....accept the fact that i will be alone for a while and i wont get to taste the love pill....

well....happy singles day everyone :)